It’s been a while since I quoted Bible verses on my blog.
It’s been months since I quoted song lyrics on my blog.
When I first started unravelling–edges I was very dependent on these words I read and heard, they spoke deep into my heart reflecting my mood.
These days perhaps because I am more comfortable with my own writing style I seem to be able to express things in my own way with more confidence and eloquence.
But every now and then it is good to go back to the start and revisit the places you came from...
So here are some thoughts from the Bible and some songs which have been swirling about my brain and sum up where I am now.
The other week at the prayer meeting we read Isaiah 41. Now I am familiar with the verses at the end of chapter 40, they are all about God giving us strength to rise up on wings like eagles. Words that we listened to in a song at Andrew’s funeral that brought me such comfort.
But these words at the beginning of chapter 41 were new or at least they spoke to me in a fresh way.
“Quiet down far flung oceans.
Sit down and rest, everyone.
Recover your strength.
Gather around me.
ay what’s on your heart.
Together let’s decide what’s right.”
God says sit down, tell me what is on your heart, even though not a single thought escapes him and he already knows our deepest hopes and fears. These were the words I needed to hear.
A gentle father speaking to his daughter, "tell me, I’m listening" he whispers breaking through the sound of my heart felt tears.
The next day I awoke to this song on the radio.
It is a song wrapped up in memories for me, some happy and some sad, it reminds me of a relationship that wasn’t as good as it should have been, also of a sunny summer afternoon when all was right with the world.
“It’s hard to carry on when you feel all alone”
laments Tim Booth the lead singer.
God replies “sit down and tell me what’s on your heart”
“Those who feel the breath of sadness
Sit down next to me
Those who find they’re touched by madness
Sit down next to me
Those who find themselves ridiculous
Sit down next to me,
In love, in fear, in hate, in tears.”
This morning I woke early and ended up having one of these moments, sad, mad and ridiculous. I literally ended up hugging the AGA, yes I know that makes me sound posh, crying my eyes out telling God all my woes and worries. The unadulterated truth.
All those thoughts that had been buzzing in my head from the past month, a month where I tried to fit in far too much suddenly exploded and God said, “Sit Down, tell me!”
It’s funny really because Andrew would rarely open up to me even when I knew something was bothering him. We all do it, shut ourselves away so easily, pretending all is fine. But bottling it up can only last so long.
A bit later in the day I heard this new release from Paloma Faith – Just Be.
I know this tune well, I have the album but today the lyrics seemed more appropriate than ever.
Yes it speaks of frustration but it is so honest about the difficulties we face in our daily lives, exposing them, acknowledging them instead of bottling them up until they explode.
Does God still speak today? Yes and he speaks to me at least not only through the words in the Bible but the in the songs that I hear every day on the radio.
It’s good to be reminded that he loves me and listens however he chooses to express that.
In return he longs for my response.
Whatever you are going through today remember to take time to sit down and just be...